Happy Birthday Grandpa

Grandpa
Norbert Bender
3/24/1926-3/31/2006

I can't believe it's been five years, five years since one of my best friends passed away. 

Five years ago we threw a surprise birthday party for his 80th birthday, it was a sunny day and I remember getting to the "party room" in his building at Leisure World.  We set up the tables, laid out all of the food (way too much food!), and the place was packed with family and friends.  I remember opening the door of the room as he came in, the look on his face, the smile, the joy, the happiness... he hated when people did things like this for him but we all loved it.

I remember spending most of the time "out of the way" with Brian and Micah, we kinda just hung out at his expense. 

Then I remember leaving early, I was going to meet a girl and watch college basketball.  I remember him blowing out the candles on the cake and I decided that would be a good time to go.  I remember coming over, shaking his hand, saying I'd see him later and then I left.

If I had known that would be the last time I ever saw him, the last time I ever shook his hand, the last time I said goodbye... I never would've left.  I am not sure how I forgive myself for not cherishing that moment, but there was no way to know that I wouldn't have another chance to ever talk to him.  I can't seem to get past it though, I can't seem to not kick myself endlessly because hanging out with my grandfather was something I did for 25+ years.  It was something that was a constant in my life, every week we'd go see Grandpa.  Even when he was sick and in the hospital I was there almost every day.  I wish I had never left, I wish I was still sitting there laughing at his jokes.

As a boy growing up there is one person who teaches you the finer things in life, one person who teaches you the other stuff that your parents aren't supposed to... that's what Grandpa's are for.

Just a few examples;
I learned that ketchup does not go on a hot dog
I learned that mayo shouldn't go on a cold cut sandwich (but i still do it!!!)
I learned that there is nothing "great" about "Great Seneca Highway"
I learned that polar bears are amazing animals
I learned how to build model cars
I learned how to fight, not with my fists, but with my heart and my soul
I learned that even a brain tumor can't take away one's sense of humor
I learned that the Redskins suck (he'd call the house after every Redskins loss to tell us how much they suck.  never a call after a win though)

And the memories... so many I can't even begin to tell, but there's one thing I will cherish forever.  Growing up playing soccer my grandfather was at almost every game, but he was not on the sidelines, he was not yelling or screaming.  My grandfather couldn't walk far so he'd watch from his car, or he'd stand far from the field but close enough to his car if he needed to sit down.  He'd be smoking his pipe filled with tobacco and he'd just watch.  Sometimes I didn't know until the game was over that he was there... and he never left early.
It's so hard to think about losing someone this close, and everyone handles it differently, but in the end it means someone has made an impact on us.  My grandfather was probably to wisest person I've ever met, having him as my grandfather is something that I am thankful for every day.  And now I live my life trying to live up to the expectations, hopes and dreams that he had for me.  I am sure I've done a solid job so far. 

If I sit here and close my eyes I see him wearing his grey sweater smoking his pipe probably telling a joke or two.  His sense of humor was second to none, no matter what life threw at him he always knew how to have a good laugh. 

If you can't tell, I love(d) my grandpa!

Happy Birthday!!!!