Worst Day of My Life

RIP
Norbert Bender
3/24/1926-3/31/2006


Friday March 31, 2006, 3pm, I had just sat down in my chair on the Assignment Desk at FOX5.  I remember not going in to our afternoon meeting, something I always did, this day I logged in to my computer and began to work.  About 10 minutes in to my shift I picked up the phone like I always did "Fox5 it's Gary" all I heard on the other end was my mom, "we lost him, he's gone, we lost him grandpa's gone."  That may have been the worst moment of my entire life.  I am pretty sure I hung up the phone and completely lost it, infront of the entire newsroom, at this point I knew I just had to get out of there.  Two people (Tom Fitzgerald and Leif Coorlim) who I still owe a huge favor to drove me to meet up with my family.  I still remember the rest of that day, I could probably give you a minute by minute replay, but I won't... worst day of my life.

For a few years I lived around the corner from my grandparents, I would drive by their neighborhood every day on my way to work.  After he passed away I got a sick feeling in my stomach every time I drove past, and it got to the point where I wanted to move, I didn't want to have that feeling every day.  I'm not sure I've told anyone this, but this was the first reason why I wanted to move out of my condo in Silver Spring.  I'm not sure what it says about me, but it is what it is.

I also have only visited my grandfathers grave once (on the 1 year anniversary).  I just don't know what to do when I go there, I mean I could sit and talk to him, but frankly I do that anyways because I know he's watching and listening to everything I do.

Five years later, five years without my grandfather, so many things have happened, he's missed so much.  I hate doing it but I've actually asked myself if I would've moved to Atlanta a few years ago if he was still alive, would I be in Bristol, CT right now if he was still alive?  I don't have an answer, honestly I think at least one decision would've been different.

I celebrate my grandfather, I have reminders in my house of him that I look at every day... I may even talk to him sometimes as if he is sitting next to me.

Last week I celebrated his life on his birthday, today I mourn his death... I wish March 31st could be erased from the calendar.

Grandpa, 3/24/26-3/31/06
May he rest in peace...